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Dr. Michelle Advice
 
Dr. Michelle K. Murray, CEO of Nexus Family Healing and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, answers questions about family relations or mental health. Submit Your Question.

 

Woman who is anxious

How Can I Overcome My Social Anxiety?

I’ve always been a little nervous around people, but I’m 37 years old and I feel like I should have grown out of this problem. When I need to introduce myself or speak in a group, I get anxious, and my face turns bright red. I don’t understand it. It’s not rational and it really bugs me. What can I do?
Man working from home

How Can I Feel Connected With My Co-Workers When I Work Remote?

I started a new job 18 months ago. Our team works remotely and that’s new for me. In the past, I’ve always gone into an office. I am really struggling to build relationships with my co-workers without having that in-person interaction. Since I started, I have felt disconnected and it’s bothering me. I have never felt that way about my work or my coworkers. What do I do to make this better?
Family conversation at the dinner table

How Do You Have Conversations About Finances With Your Family?

My siblings and I have good jobs and each of us can take care of ourselves. We all pay our bills, feed our families, and enjoy some extra pleasures. The issue is that I make more money than my parents and my two siblings and this can become awkward at times. Whenever I buy something a little more expensive for myself or others, they ask me how much it cost. Sometimes they insinuate or try to guess my income level to see if I will confirm or deny their suspicions. How do I handle these uncomfortable situations? I don’t want to tell them how much I pay for things, or my income, and I wish they wouldn’t ask.
Women sad missing the holidays

How Do I Handle Not Being Able To Make It Home for the Holidays?

The holidays are really tough for me. I live far away from my family and this will be the second year in a row I am not able to make it back to see them. I can feel myself starting to push away from my family just to protect myself from feeling left out. I’m sad and I seem to cry at the drop of a hat. What do I do?
Parents taking son holiday shopping

How Do I Teach My Child Gratitude?

My six-year-old son doesn’t seem to have any appreciation for the gifts we get him. It’s especially bad around the holidays. He’s not grateful, pouts if it is not exactly what he wants, and sometimes even asks for more. I’ve tried to explain to him that his behavior isn’t polite and that he should be happy with what he has, which is plenty, but it’s not changing. What do I do?
Women on the phone

How Do I Set a Boundary With a Friend Who Is Taking Advantage of Me?

Lately, I have been feeling that one of my friends is taking advantage of me. Every time she calls it is always about her. I don't mind being an ear to listen but it is starting to get exhausting. I am also going through some big life changes but she never asks how I am doing. I am not sure how to set this boundary or even bring it up to her. I don't think she even realizes she is doing it. Where should I go from here?
Parent Coaching Support

What Is Parent Coaching and How Does It Work?

I am a state human service employee, currently working with parents who I believe need one-on-one coaching. There are parenting classes offered through some of our state programs, but I think the parents need more one-on-one help on how to positively engage and encourage their children. The idea of coaching came to my mind. I didn’t know that such a profession existed until I started researching online. Can you explain more about this type of service, when to use it, and how to access?
Women stressed about the holidays

How Do I Better Manage My Time Around the Holidays?

With the holidays coming up I tend to run myself thin. I do it every year! I end up with a packed calendar and I tend to go overboard with everything because I want the holidays to be special for everyone. At the same time my husband's workload picks up so I end up doing more around the house and more with the kids. I can already feel the anxiety and exhaustion coming. How do I better manage all of this? 
Stressed Teenage boy

How Can We Best Support Our Teenager Who Is Struggling With Behavioral Health Issues?

We are looking at options to help our 15-year-old son who has many continuous problems. He is stealing, lying, and cheating. He had violent outbursts when he’s confronted. He self-harms, has inappropriate sexual behaviors, fights, lack of empathy and more. What is our best solution for these behaviors?
Older man sitting on a couch reading a book

Handling the Holidays

As we enter into the busy season of the holidays, it is more important than ever to practice self-care. I often receive questions this time of year from individuals who are stressed or feeling depressed. My advice is to stay in tune with your feelings and focus on positive actions that support your mental health